Today, Mata Thai's mala hotpot surprised me, pleasantly. At dusk, my mum accompanied me in the living room as I benched while watching Mark Wien's Penang adventures. The muted colours and dull darkness outside accompanied us.
I shall remember today. Just like how I remember a seemingly insignificant memory of me answering my mum "Ye Ma?" in the living room while she was shifting the laundry poles outside. I was 4 years old.
I believe this is what silent happiness feels like.
My laughter projected skywards (three times iirc) when I first heard "As Long As You Follow" by Fleetwood Mac while walking home this evening.
I foresee holding the proverbial hand of my 4 year old self during trying times.
"As long as you follow."
There seems to be nothingness from where I stand. Vast blackness. It seems like only non-transactional sincerity can brighten up my sight. For now, I shall be polite with my life's sadness. I shall welcome small joys, so small that no one will see them.
What are the odds of Taufik Batisah pointing directly at me to come up on stage for a fun segment. Did not wish to go up but was coaxed by him. A dream come true to interact with my idol. It felt surreal. God-sent. I must have done something good in my life. I must continue to be a grateful servant.
"See, your life is not always bitter", said Mama over the phone.
Duty in office on CNY.
Sitting beside the window. Rolling clouds and swaying trees. Tranquil silence. Peace amidst all internal chaos. I teared badly when I imagined myself standing at the peak of a mountain. It will not be the view that gets me.
Life is tough. I am afraid of losing loved ones and the things I love.
Dear God - the Most Wise and Most Merciful - only You can save us all. All Praise is to You.
This weather holds extra significance to a dulling soul. The chilly winds, the muted colours evoked by surrounding grayness, the full moon's halo caused by minute crystals in the high cirrus clouds, the sweet ozone announcing the imminence of rain, the inward musings gravitated by denser atmospheres, and not forgetting the light heavenly tears dancing with boundless trust that they will nourish the hearts in need.
Time and time again, we rediscover that the beauty of the world starts from within.
Two days ago, a soul repeatedly muttered that things would not go his way. That very evening, the sky echoed a Divine response with the most intense shade of sepia.
Life has been tough for him. Balancing fear and hope is no easy feat.
He should remember the engraved simplicity on his ring.
2:186 | 3:190-191
A reminder. One's weakness may be a strength. One's strength may be a pitfall.
When we get tested with what we perceive as unjustified hardship, it may be difficult to appreciate them as opportunities, even with forms of blessing from God's Gentleness and Wisdom.
Hidayah comes from Him, and it exists in souls that still have the littlest goodness. Riddled emotions are signs of His Mercy. The inner compass calibrates itself to find Truth. It is important to be real and pay attention to the little cracks. Find our own ways, through solitude and silence. The inner spring flows differently for everyone
Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.
The Most Wise and Most Merciful has beautiful ways to show His Promise.
A few days ago on the way to work, I soaked in the subtle mist of evaporating dews, refracting the frequencies of morning light onto a stretch of yellowflames. A common view that speaks to those who listens with their sight, I feel.
I teared a little while listening to the playlist of reminders. Interesting for a heart to soften in gratitude, during hardship.
"Alhamdulillah."
That night, I received a call from my Director, informing me of my promotion.
