Don't want to be caught sleeptalking, so I've to get a few things out of my head before I sleep. Yea, things like the paragraph above. Unnecessary. Meaningless. Unproductive. Unrealistic. Unrelated. Well, maybe. I vaguely recall an advice - Stare at the night horizon of the sea, one day, if you're ready and permitted to, you'll see beyond it.
Patience.
An admiration of the untouched nature, the traditional farm life, the oldies and classics, the old environment - those are symptoms of my obsession of the past era. Maybe I've tasted its essence when it had no meaning to me back then when I couldn't talk, and somehow, my instincts are searching for it now. I guess it's subtly due to my craving for deja-vu's. Or I'm just jealous of the trade made between the past and present. Silly isn't it, going back in time when you're not even born yet.
Two hours. I'm the only one awake.
Enough of my deluded fantasy. A little more relevant now, hopefully.
I was told, selfless acts don't exist. The start of selflessness just leads to one being a selfish person. Things are being done to feel good. You walked a blind person across a street. You drop a piece of note into a donation box. You did a noble act without anyone watching or crediting you. You just want to feel good, they say.
Well, take the sacrifice of being called a selfish person if that's the definition. Then, may I ask. Will that be selflessness? Don't let your intent be a lie to yourself, especially to The One that hears the unspoken words.
Changing their mindset's not easy. It takes courage.
I don't have it. Maybe I can't think of the right way to do it.
Or maybe some of us are fated to be blinded in certain ways.
0200 hrs. I think I can finally sleep now. Commissioner's coming to vet us in the afternoon.
Yes, I should be sleeping now.
Imagination. Dreams. Live in them.